With or without you...

"
See the stone set in your eyes
See the thorn twist in your side
I wait for you

Sleight of hand and twist of fate
On a bed of nails she makes me wait
And I wait without you

With or without you
With or without you

Through the storm we reach the shore
You give it all but I want more
And Im waiting for you

With or without you
With or without you
I cant live
With or without you

And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give
And you give
And you give yourself away

My hands are tied
My body bruised, shes got me with
Nothing to win and
Nothing left to lose

And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give
And you give
And you give yourself away

With or without you
With or without you
I cant live
With or without you

With or without you
With or without you
I cant live
With or without you
With or without you"


------------------- U2

Random..

"Reality is just a bad dream.. The problem is I am still sleeping!"


-- Inspiration in ISPE class today... though not by it..

Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi....

One of the best movies i have seen till date..
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0411469/

not many movies can force me to write about them.. but i think this one is different in a lot of ways.. the main motivation for me again came from weird sources. I was in a group meeting when a group mate was watching this movie. This kind of small spark is the kind of spark i need to be attracted towards a movie. Another main motivation behind this movie for me was the fact that it was set in 1970s, an era in post-independence India that I really like to read and know a lot about.. I dont know why but that era just kind of attracts me with the emergency, the blind pursuit of power by people whose parents were the ones who fought for independence, and to my mind is a seed for thought as to how different are we from pre-independence era..

The movie is about a girl called Geeta who comes from London and loves a guy called Siddhartha. Sid comes from a well to do family but is more inclined towards working for oppressed people in Bihar and goes for revolutionary methods.. Geeta also has another admirer in Vikram, whose father is a staunch Gandhian and doesnt approve of the then Congress Govt Methods.. Vikram on the other hand wants to become big in life and isnt much interested in what is going on in India..

The movie is a stark reminder of what are we going forward. We all in IITs and IIMs are behind the big bucks and dont care about what is happening in India. I have thought over this though many a times but havent come out in favour of one side of another.. Having being in both of these so called "esteemed institutions" one very striking similarity in these places is the presence of very high no. of middle class junta in this place.. People like me never had the privilege of being exhorbirant.. i came from a good middle class family where the fact that i have to make my career and no one would be able to do anything for me.. perhaps the absence of any option on which i can fall upon if I failed was the biggest driving factor for me to choose the tried and tested path of engg/management etc and not going for anything other path or any kind of social service.. and i think 95% of the junta in these 2 places would agree with this.. even if we want, it just is a night long thought since with the morning comes the hectic life where the cost of us failing or going to a different path is too high for comfort..

i dont know if this all makes sense but atleast for the remaining night, all i want to do is to bring in a change in this country, though the morning tomm, this world would have changed me again into the scared person for whom the gigantic task of working towards a change in society would be too much for his weak shoulders...

nothing to do.. and an ode....

yeah thats me.. have nothing to do lately.. and turn back time say 10 days back.. this would have been a big joke for me.. life changes dude..
this blog is an ode to the many many blogs i have been reading lately.. most of those unknown to me.. some of my friends.. i love reading others blog.. bad as it may be, i have started going through orkut profiles of many many people and unlike most who go staight to the album [beleive me i have seen many of my friends do that!> i go and straight look at the blogid if they have posted one.. and if they havent, i move out of their profiles.. (though if its a really good looking girl's profile, i do sometimes allow myself the liberty to peep into their album as well ;) ] i dont know.. i never have been a writer myself.. but i do like reading.. and reading other people's blog sort of connects me to them.. though most of the times i dont even know them or would ever come across them.. but still i feel a real connection for the duration that i am reading their blogs.. and i really like it.. i dont know if it is intruding into their privacy but still..

PS: i tried to evolve my blog around a character the good ol' subzero is back :)

summers in november!

people say a minute is enough to change your life.. i wont say it was one minute for me and that it is one big change in my life.. but yes in matter of some hours, my stay here just became much much cooler than before.. and more importantly, i am going to london for summers!! 13 shortlists on the 13th day.. for many it cudnt get any unluckier than that.. but for me surprisingly, 13th has never been an unlucky number.. had 3 offers from the 4 banks i interviewed with and that was enough for me.. going to lehman brothers for summers... rest laters..

happy diwali

happy diwali folks..

happy diwali

happy diwali folks! :)

another random mumbling..

i know my day counting is going horribly weird bt thn who cares? having all kinds of experieces now a days, n cant say they are my better ones.. started reading Fountainhead and weirdly, am trying to interpret it too.. i dont know why i am writing this blog now, since apparently neither am i pissed, nor happy.. but its just one of those times when you feel like running away because you know something is wrong,and weirdly you just cant pinpoint what is wrong? its one of those times when everything seems to hit rock bottom, and you just dont know where to run to.. or more importantly where to hide.. or do i have to hide? am all confused.. but again, is it something new? NO.. not with me atleast.. somehow everything is hazy in my mind... and i cant relate to anything... i cant find my peace of mind.. and this is just adding to all the confusion and chaos! for once i dont know what should i do to make this all right.. and i dont even know if i can make all this right? and more importantly i dont even know if all this canbe made right?? i want to get numb again.. i think the feeling i am trying to resit from a long long time is my only survival trick.. somehow its not good to be unnatural.. n being numb comes naturally to me..think should become numb again.. "then to hell with this world and all its people.. for i have become ... comfortably numb!"

again i have stuff to do and i dont want to.. dont know when will the time come that i do something i want to do.. but lets leave that topic away for a second..had some interesting classes today.. marketing was fun..(it always is unless your group is being cold called! :P ) learnt about fundoo stuff like pepsi succeding to make some inroads in market only when coke screws up.. for an ardent pepsi fan, this isnt the best thing to hear (though i dont know why.. i mean pepsi not having large market share wont change it for me.. but i guess thats what is called brand loyalty ;) ) also we learnt about some other ways to look at probs, some which if not told would never come in my mind.. :P
after that we had our IGP class which was about negotiations.. one of the rare classes where i did not agree with the stuff taught, though it wasnt wrong as such.. i mean the instructor taught us to be open and have faith in our counterpart while going for negotiations, which was focussing more on the moral aspect of negotiation.. again i wasnt sure how correct it would be because then in that case, you are opening up yourself for attack because the info that you give out might contain information which would be your constraint and your counterpart may use it against you.. again the moral thing is out there but till the time you are getting some info because of some stupidity of your counterpart and no fraud from your side, i think one should use that during negotiation..controversial, you take your call... :)


btw am still waiting..

you know your life has changed when..

• your mobile phone has become a mere alarm clock
• you go to sleep 4 in the morn and get up at 4 in the evening.. and undergo 8 hours of gruelling classes and quizzes in between those times..
• a maggi is all u can have if you r feeling hungry anytime after 9!
• you blog wen you should study.. and you blog not because you want to blog but just to run away from studies
• group studies is considered more important than individual studies , though individual performance is much much more important than group performance..
• after writing a blog you change all "u"s to "you"s and so on to get your "yanko!" english out of the system and get back to good old victorian one..

is it my life or me that has changed?? i wonder....

am waiting..

is it just me or is everyone confused all the time.. i mean everyday everytime i sit down to think what should i do, i think about possibly everything else in the universe except what i sat down to think about.. weird it may be but it is so starkingly obvious to me that sometimes, its really terrifying.. may be am not the only one in this herd.. or may be i am.. whatever it may be, the confusion, the chaos just lingers on.. chaos people say is good, and i agree, but then to always live in constant chaos is too much.. the mind doesnt think what it is supposed to think.. or is there anything that the mind is "supposed" to think??
a lot of people have asked me whether am i ever sure of anything? somehow the sense that anything other than the obvious can happen, however less the chance of tht happening be, creates that suspicion in my mind.. and may be this suspicion has led to be highly critical of anything that i do or think.. i mean for me anyone saying that he is sure of something makes me uncomfortable, and i still wonder why? it may be as obvious as "the sun will come up again tommorrow" but for me the fact that whether this is true or not will be known tommorrow morning itself, so how can someone be so sure of sit today is a big big confusion..

people call me weird... i guess i have given u sufficient reason why... :)

as for the subject, am still waiting..

am i posting?

seriously cant imagine me posting today but i am.. ohhk lets keep this one short too? hows the new template? fine as of now.. by the time am writing my next blog, i dont know.. yeah thats me.. btw i hve examz from monday.. please please pray for me junta!!

another post in the blog..

ok i wanted the title to sound something like "another brick in the wall" but failed miserably.. move on to the present.. time 1:30 am in the morn.. i am doing a QM assignment and have to do a MC case too.. that is when am not doing anything about eco so why this blog .. no idea.. jus tht i wanted to take u guys thru wat i am doing now on.. chalo me bck to ques.. will come bck once it is over....
another ques bites the dust.. still a lot to go till i become free

fucking 38 variables and 40+ constraints.. wtf.. am doing the dhobi work right now!! :x
more than an hour gonen i still havent been able to complete 20 fucking constraints.. wtf!
3 o'clock.. and i finally get the ans!! yahooo!!

chalo bck to work.. MC assignment to do!! abhi ke liye itna hi.. baaki samahchar baad main..

another bad day in office.. kind of has become a norm here :( rest laters...

first up..

okay this came from the fact tht a lot of people rubbishhed me for using yahoo and not google.. sorry boss.. am in here..